Being good at everything sucks. I don’t know why it is that I was cursed with this natural ability to do just about anything. You’d think it were a blessing but it has confined me to a private hell. Contrary to what you may think, being good at everything doesn’t put you on top of the world, but instead has the adverse effect of burdening you with the incessant supplications of the common people with whom you are unfortunate enough to be acquainted. I just thank goodness for tree lopping services, Melbourne wide, for saving me from another inconvenience of having to give favours.
You know how perceptive old people are right? They’ll repeat the question they asked you five minutes ago but they’ll pick up on some minor thing you did five years ago retain it with awe-inspiring tenacity. Thus my neighbour, old man Miles, spotted me lopping down a tree in my front yard years ago and it came back to haunt me. The old codger rapped on my door, wanting to know if I could help him out with tree removal at his property across the street. I looked out at the enormous stump he wanted me to get rid of and thought, ‘Am I ever going to get a minute to myself around here?!’
I put my foot down. I feel proud of myself for showing enough spine to say No, demarcating my limits. He was a little dejected but I told him that there are plenty of companies that do stump removal around Melbourne. He was skeptical of prices and efficiency – he wanted as good a job as I had done in my own yard (and who can blame him?) – and I too offered these suggestions not really believing that they’d be the most economical. But hot diggity if I wasn’t wrong about that. The tree removal company came around and removed the stump without leaving so much as a trace of it behind. And the old man sat around grinning on his porch for the rest of the afternoon.